We talked about impostor syndrome last week, and since then a lot of stuff has happened in our country. We decided today to double down on another mental health check to talk about something that is essential for your survival: self care.

WHAT EXACTLY IS SELF CARE?

You hear the term thrown around a lot, but what constitutes self care? Psychology Today says “Self care in essence is the mindful taking of time to pay attention to you, not in a narcissistic way, but in a way that ensures that you are being cared for by you.”

1. Self care is one of those things where your mileage may vary, it’s going to look a little different from person to person. Why? Because your self care routine is totally unique to your brain… we all tick differently, so it only makes sense that we would unwind and relax differently too, yeah?
2. From that same Psychology Today article, they give some ideas on what self care can look like… so let’s talk about that, because we aren’t psychologists or therapists.
   • Self care can look like:
     • Taking time to know yourself better – this can look different from person to person, for me, it looks like journaling, keeping myself in check when things get to feel overwhelming, and paying attention to why I might be overwhelmed.
     • Finding what is fun for you, and incorporating those things into your daily life
     • Knowing your limits – this is unique to you
     • Getting enough sleep, and getting QUALITY sleep 
     • Making sure your body is getting enough food and water
     • Finding ways to decompress thru your day
     • Giving some thought to changing a difficult work situation
     • Taking the time to love yourself

WHY IS SELF CARE SO IMPORTANT?

We’ve used the term “compassion fatigue” before on the pod, and that’s your answer. We’ve all hit burnout in some capacity, but right now, it seems like most everyone is burned out. Some people know how to deal with it, some don’t. BUT there is a difference between compassion fatigue and burnout.

1. What is compassion fatigue? WebMD defines it as, “Compassion fatigue is a term that describes the physical, emotional, and psychological impact of helping others — often through experiences of stress or trauma. Compassion fatigue is often mistaken for burnout, which is a cumulative sense of fatigue or dissatisfaction.”
   • There are many things that can push a person to compassion fatigue, but the one we are really going to talk about today is how desensitized we have become as a culture to bad things that happen around us. 
     • We’ve been running through a pandemic gauntlet for the last almost-three years, and in the US, it seems like we have a new kind of tragedy every day. It gets to be a lot. I’m tired. I bet you’re tired too… and this is why self care is so important. We can’t stop giving fucks about the shit that’s worth actually giving a fuck about. 

OKAY, SO HOW DO I GET INTO A SELF CARE ROUTINE?

Self care can be whatever helps refill your cup. If you’re still not sure how to start, it’s okay, we gotchoo.

1. Self care activities can be things like:
   • Exercising. We know it’s good for the body, but it’s also so good for the brain. Even a 30 minute walk every day can help boost your mood and improve your health. 
   • Practicing gratitude. This can be hard, especially when it feels like everything is going to shit, but it’s still important. Remind yourself of the things you’re actually grateful for. You can be as specific as you want, and it helps to write them down.
   • Focus on positivity. Again, can be hard. Identify and challenge those negative thoughts in your brain. 
   • Stay connected. Also hard. This is literally the LAST thing I wanna do when I’m not mentally well, but it’s necessary. Humans need social interaction, I usually tap in to the OG section of my inner circle when this happens… they’re used to it. 
2. Self love is hard to find, but it’s so so great when you finally break through the noise and learn to like yourself.
   • I found a really great quote this morning as I was prepping to write these notes, and we are gonna close with it:    

“If we don’t practice self love, we will search for that love elsewhere. We will assume that the love we crave is in the hands of another human. We will betray ourselves, put others on a pedestal, and lower our self-worth just to grasp at scraps of affection. Sweet friend, the love you are looking for is inside of you. Keep digging.”

WHEN TO REACH OUT TO A PRO – Seek professional help if you are experiencing severe or distressing symptoms that have lasted two weeks or more, such as:

• Difficulty sleeping
• Appetite changes that result in unwanted weight changes
• Struggling to get out of bed in the morning because of mood
• Difficulty concentrating
• Loss of interest in things you usually find enjoyable
• Inability to perform usual daily functions and responsibilities

Don’t wait until your symptoms are overwhelming. Talk about your concerns with your primary care provider, who can refer you to a mental health specialist if needed.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/skinny-revisited/201805/self-care-101

https://www.webmd.com/mental-health/signs-compassion-fatigue

https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/caring-for-your-mental-health